Birth experiences-hospital vs. homebirth- Guest post

I have asked several women who have had a natural childbirth to share their experiences.  This first post is from Jen, a woman who has experienced it all.  She’s been in the hospital, been induced, and on pain meds, she’s had home births and she’s also had a c-section.  I am hoping that her experiences will help some women to take the steps to become more educated about the birthing process. 

“When we found out we were expecting our first child, we were surprised, excited, and totally naive.  We were both in the Air Force and stationed in Japan.  We did what everyone else did, no questions asked.  I immediately asked to separate from the military and was granted that request.  For the next 6 months I dreamed of a baby.  The actual birth experience didn’t really register.  We attended a birthing class courtesy of the military.  It was fun and a little enlightening, but I was still living in a dream world.

The actual labor and delivery opened my eyes a little, but I still tended to listen and not try to learn things on my own.  I opted to NOT have any pain meds because my pain threshold is very high.  If you don’t know what that means, basically it means I can take a lot of pain.  I labored for 14 hours before my little girl was born.  At about 8 hours the doctor or someone (I don’t really remember much) suggested I take some Stadoll (sp?) so that I could get some rest.  It did help me rest, but about 4 hours later, they came back in and said that now I needed pitocin to speed the contractions back up.  I was not progressing as they thought I should.  I blindly did whatever they suggested.  I pushed for I guess about 2 hours.  There was meconium in the water when they broke it (yes, they had to break my water), and they moved me into the surgery room so there would be more room for the additional staff they had to have.  The nurse/midwife who was doing the delivery barely made it to the end of the bed in time to catch our daughter.  She literally came out in one push.  (BTW – I had another daughter do that 10 years later – they both have narrow shoulders).  She had to have oxygen as a precaution, but she was fine.

Twenty-two months later we had separated from the Air Force and were living here in East TN.  I was at a local hospital ushering another girl into the world.  This one was a little more trouble.  I was 10 days overdue and they decided to induce me.  I labored for 8 horrible hours.  No pain meds though.  After delaying my contractions on my first child, I was NOT having any more.  We had actually looked into using a midwife at home because of the great testimony of a friend who had done this, but at the time it was not happening for us.

My next child was a boy.  Induced, in the hospital.  Their reason for induction?  They thought my second child weighed too much and they wanted to prevent that with this one.  (She had been 8 lbs 14 oz – yeah, wait till I have a 10 lb 4 oz one – my last baby – whatever).

But my fourth child was the last straw.  Induced again; this time because of gestational diabetes.  My children were 22 months, 16 months, and now 19 months apart.  Pretty close.  I think I can remember what it feels like to have a baby.  The nurses WOULD NOT LISTEN TO ME!  If I hadn’t been in the throes of labor, I think I would have chewed them out.  Nah, probably not, it’s not me.  But I had to send my husband out TWICE for them to get the doctor!  They still didn’t listen to me and in fact the NURSE delivered my baby!  The doctor strolled in about 10 minutes later to check me.  Ha!  And guess who was on the paper as “attending physician” – and got paid the big bucks!  Oh well… that’s medical practice people.  So, I had just experienced my worst delivery ever, I turned to my husband and said “If we have any more, I’m doing this at home!”  And I did.

Which brings me to my fifth child and greatest birth (so far).  We changed churches a few months after our fourth was born.  In this church was a lady who had 12 children and had had 10 of them at home.  She really taught me a lot about what the hospitals do that are not necessary and how a homebirth lets you be in control.  Since then, I think some hospitals have loosened up a little on their protocol.  You CAN refuse certain things.  (I’m glad I found that out, since we did have to use the hospital on our latest birth; an emergency c-section). 

But, back to our first homebirth.  We used the same midwife as the lady in the church (who BTW has went on to have 5 more children).  I love our midwife.  She is so understanding and always lets the parents make the decisions.  She will lay the facts out in front and then leave the decision up to you.  Since 3 of my 4 children had been induced, I wasn’t sure anymore what was real labor and what was false.  I woke up at about 4 a.m. on Dec. 30, 2003 in labor.  I called her around 20 minutes later, but still wasn’t sure if they were real or not.  I did the change position thing and they kept going.  She said she would come if it would make me more comfortable.  I said yes and she was on her way.  The only thing was, she lived 2 hours away.  We both thought I had time.  I woke up my husband who started to get things ready.  We had our birth kid laid out, a friend was called and on her way to sit with the other children.  The pain was getting to be uncomfortable and I had read that a hot shower would help.  I hopped in the shower and didn’t get out.  At about 5:30 I was feeling the urge to push.  I tried not to since I knew that the midwife was not there yet.  My husband couldn’t find her cell phone number and we just decided that we would have to do what needed to be done.  He got in the tub behind me (I had turned off the shower by now) and caught our 3 son.  A few minutes later the midwife showed up.  I had actually been able to already get the baby nursing (this helps expel the placenta) and we were basically just waiting (still in the tub) for her to show up.  Poor lady – she only got to do the dirty work!  Later she told me that she didn’t rush, because usually when the mom is this close to delivery she’s NOT on the phone with the midwife!  So that one went so fast and so easy.  It really encouraged us to continue having our children at home. 

We had three more at home before we had to have another hospital birth.  That one was because the baby just would not turn around the right way.  When I went into labor he was still breech, with a foot presenting, and floating way up.  My midwife was really nervous with it and so we decided to take the hospital route.  She said worst case scenario, my water breaks (it was bulging – her words) and the cord comes out first – which is very bad for baby.  I would have been fine whatever happened, but we wanted what was best for baby, too.  The best decision, but one I really wish we could have avoided.  I honestly don’t understand anyone who actually chooses to have a c-section.  It was the worst recovery of any birth I had experienced.  I sincerely pray that I don’t have to go through that again.  To add to that, he was jaundiced just over the point where they had us put him under bilirubin lights.  We finally convinced them to let us go home, with the understanding that our doctor would check him out asap.  He improved so quickly after that.  I firmly believe that a baby can sense when mom is upset and it causes them to be upset.  I was just so tense and wanted to be home so badly.  We all relaxed when we could finally leave.

For anyone wavering on whether to have a homebirth or not, I can tell you, they are the best ever.  No nurses constantly coming in to monitor (when 99% of it is unnecessary), you’re surrounded by your own familiar things, you can eat or drink when you feel like it, you can walk around (which helps with bringing the baby down), you just have so much freedom! 

But in any case: research, research, research!  Talk to ladies who have trod the path before you.  Talk to your husband and see how comfortable he is with it.  (Mine was all for it).  Find a really good midwife.  (If you live in East TN – I can recommend one ).  But above all – enjoy the birth and the wonderful blessing it is giving you.  A sweet, precious gift from God.”

 - Jen
jent-manyblessings.blogspot.com

Thank you to Jen for sharing.  If anyone has a birth story or stories that they think are inspiring or informative and would like to share please contact me and I’ll post yours as well.

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